I’m typing this with one finger on my iPad 

  • Which is better than not typing at all.  Doing my best which isn’t very good to be honest.  Still, it’s better than nothing.  Doing my best.  I’m tired of explaining to people that, no, I’m not suicidal just because I am not upset at the thought of dying.  I will die.  We all will.  I’m not alone in finding life hard.  I’m not alone in not wanting it to be so hard.  I’m not going to put more work into ending my life.  It’s hard enough.  I’m also not the only person who is not happy with the way my life is going.  What can I do?  I get up each day and breathe in and out all day long.  I try not to throw up from the constant dizziness.  I try not to get so bored I’m willing to do almost anything.  One thing about being in chronic pain – one can do stuff – more than with dizziness.  Who would’ve thunk I would find anything worse (more boring) than living in constant pain?

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4 thoughts on “I’m typing this with one finger on my iPad 

  1. Sorry Life Is Hard And Painful Just Know That I Think Of You Often Hoping You Are Doing Better! Love,Cindy

  2. I hear you loud and clear! Vertigo may not be terribly painful, but, unlike chronic pain, there’s no way to get used to it. And it gets a bit boring waiting for the miracle that takes the dizziness away. And, yes, death is one of the conditions of life. Everything that lives will die yet we don’t get to choose when, where or how we die. That belongs to Hashem.

  3. Dizziness is my worst fear. When it comes I go into a full panic over it because I was bedridden for a year when I was 18 due to it. Yes you would think chronic pain would be the worst but dizziness. Oh that is just the icing on the cake for a chronic illness. But you are stil pushing forward with your positive words of staying alive and breathing. Some days all we can do is breathe. I’m really glad you wrote this. I am just praying that dizziness goes and stays gone for you. Hoping!

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